Another after a while :)

It’s been a while. I miss my old self. I missed blogging. Everything is just in my mind, crumbling. Sometimes it hurts, sometimes it’s tiring. It’s just that i can’t find the will to put off everything like i used to.
I’ve been focusing too much to US/HER that I’ve forgotten a LOT of people in my world before he came. It turned out that he’s the only priority and it’s not right. It’s never healthy, I know. and most of the time it hurts.

I promised myself back then that I will never ever put myself AGAIN into this kind of situation...... and I broke it. I’m here... Again. And it seems like this is more....... painful.  More...... dreadful. 
Good thing is that it becomes a way of testing myself how much I sincerely do love him. That no matter how painful things are becoming, I’m still here... wanting him everyday... which is likely how I am before.

I want to make believe that this will be all worth it. He will sooner or later.. Realize. :/