Someone taught me that dreams do come true. But nobody warned me that I have to take a lot of risk before anything else…. That I always have to.
She then came back when my mind is being tormented in progress with our memories together. I tried to resist the eagerness that was within my mind. I tried to forget the “love” I have….. But I failed.
I hugged her back as if nothing happened. I kissed her as if I wasn’t hurt at all.
Trusting her every second to hold me like a tenuous infant again. Expecting her not to break my vulnerable heart once more.
And of course, I failed.
Now I can’t even blame her for this pain. I know its my fault, I accepted her again…. Even though I already knew that every second I get to spend with her, I’m just making the pain worst. The pain that I know I am going to face in the end. The pain that I know I’m going to face…. Alone.
I AM.
- BHEA;)
- im not a seamless person, just like everybody else. I am a daughter with such priorities. I am sister who cares for my sisters. I am a student who knows when to be best. I am a child of God who knows how unconditional His love for me. I can be a playmate with no means of winning. I can be someone to trust with no doubt of listening. i can be your lifetime friend as long as betraying isn't in your vocabulary. I can deal with different people. I can share my own experiences as long as it can help you learn your stuffs in life. I can be your forever if you can deal with my erratic mood swings. i can be your own vile experience, worst nightmare. but i can be your sweetest dream ever. "PLEASING SOMEONE" isn't on my list. So i could be the worst person you can ever meet. Being reckless and stupid is my SATIATION way of being happy.... BECAUSE I'M LOOKING FOR SOMEONE WHO COULD TREAT ME AS A FRAGILE SO BADLY. Someone who could be my SUPERMAN. :)