1 and a half hour to go and I have to wash up and prepare myself for the upcoming event later this afternoon.
I decided to blog first because I just realized of being so boring on writing poems this passed few days—which is so unusual.
Talking about REALIZATIONS, I’ve met a lot of it this month.
SAYING GOODBYE TO A CERTAIN PERSON WHO MADE MY LIFE PERFECT FOR ONCE.
You see, it’s a total whack but apparently I do felt great afterwards. Perhaps, this is the time where we should end up being so stuck-up on each other’s world. She may have been that someone who made my life perfect for once, but she’s also that someone who made me horrible. Maybe that’s life, that there’s always this someone that will come and pass. (Anyway even friends do.)
I JUST HAVE TO EITHER WAIT OR TO LOOK AROUND.
Yep! I know I have to. Dang. There are lots of people in this world. We might have been together now but sooner or later someone will take over our places. So just thought of stop putting myself behind bars and take a look at the big world. (I have great realization right?)
I JUST GET USED TO IT.
Of everything, EVERYTHING. I got lots of circumstances that I always depend on her because I’m scared to do it by myself and now that what makes things harder. I can’t do lots of usual stuffs because she usually does it for me and every time that I have to do it, I’ll automatically realizes HOW she do things for me.
And now I’m trying my best to do those things but still, I am scared and it really sucks!
I NEED TO BE OPTIMISTIC AND STAND FIRM OF WHAT I HAVE DECIDED.
Be positive. Think as if she doesn’t have the chance to hurt you again when it’s true. Act as if you are better than before and let it be. Make her realize how much is her loss and how much you’ve done good without her criticizing. Stand firm and let her realize that nobody exist like you so she can’t have another you. Let her feel the yearning and let her be the one affected instead of you.
BE TOUGH.
No matter what, never turn back. Don’t make the same mistake again. No turning back because it is not worth the pain.
I AM.
- BHEA;)
- im not a seamless person, just like everybody else. I am a daughter with such priorities. I am sister who cares for my sisters. I am a student who knows when to be best. I am a child of God who knows how unconditional His love for me. I can be a playmate with no means of winning. I can be someone to trust with no doubt of listening. i can be your lifetime friend as long as betraying isn't in your vocabulary. I can deal with different people. I can share my own experiences as long as it can help you learn your stuffs in life. I can be your forever if you can deal with my erratic mood swings. i can be your own vile experience, worst nightmare. but i can be your sweetest dream ever. "PLEASING SOMEONE" isn't on my list. So i could be the worst person you can ever meet. Being reckless and stupid is my SATIATION way of being happy.... BECAUSE I'M LOOKING FOR SOMEONE WHO COULD TREAT ME AS A FRAGILE SO BADLY. Someone who could be my SUPERMAN. :)